I am one crazy lady.

[Insert biggest sigh ever-in-the-history-of-everything HERE.]

i am ....ALONE!!!!
i am puppy-dog sitting and i have the ENTIRE apartment to mySELF!!!
Hallelujah!
holy moly!
This is so great!
I could scream right now and no one would know!
I could dance around singing ridiculous 50's pop songs at the top of my lungs!
I could cry
read
write
play guitarra-
sit
in
silence!
Wow.
This is so great.

Now, to the crazy lady section of this blog (if you don't consider the earlier bit to be that....) I am so torn about what i want to do. I mean somedays the clarity makes my eyes water and my heart rejoice and other days- well, i feel like this.
i know what makes me come alive. i know my passions...now God, how exactly do i squish all those things together? ......and AFFORD it????
it is both a blessing and a curse to be of the artistic persuasion. Nothing i could imagine myself doing would ever make ANY money. Not that money is what i'm after- not at all. I am very content to live humbly for the rest of my life, die with very little material posessions. It's not that. It's just....that it costs money to live!!! to travel, buy art materials, guitar strings, food...things of this nature.
Hmmm...
There are always so many factors.
People, places, timing...

:-P ("pthhhbbb.")
...Thats how i feel about that.

You know, this all sounds very light and comical- this blog, that is. But really this is something that weighs on my heart a bit.
I think the comedy routine serves to provide some levity.
So....
imagine dancing chimpanzees and loud circus-type music...
children, skipping in circles,
shannon singing songs about elephants in her head,
oompa loompas!

what the heck- anything that is utterly ridiculous and makes you feel slightly scared and belly laugh at the same time.

gosh i miss shannon.

i need someone to go nuts with.

it's kinda worrisome, i think, when you are all alone writing things like this.
i may erase this so you all don't seriously begin to question my sanity.
-What will you think??-

yikes.